Halloween is right around the corner but maybe you’ve been in character for some time. I know some people who have!
“I don’t just want to stop being an employee, she volunteered, I want to stop being a witch.”
That’s what a new client said as we discussed what she wanted to do with her future. She has given me permission to share her comment but I am sure she is really saying what many people are thinking.
When you are in a soul-sucking job working for a boss who is a narcissist or maybe one that makes you feel like someone you hardly recognize, it’s likely you might be just plain nasty and often to those you care about the most.
My client shared that she always saw herself as a tolerant, open-minded, generous person but in the past two years, she had become sarcastic, narrow-minded and impatient.
“I come home not just tired but I’m often angry and every little thing sets me off. It’s like I spend all day holding it together and then when I leave I just explode.” she tearfully reported.
Truth be told, she is in a very difficult work situation. The culture there is undermining every effort she puts forth. She feels sabotaged at every turn. Often a project is praised one day and then completely ripped apart the next. The unpredictability of her boss and the lack of any company cohesiveness would have take a toll on most people.
While her situation may be far different than one you are dealing with, any time our work impacts our lives in a negative manner, there is cause for concern. Sure, there are days at any job, even when you own your own business, when you will feel frustrated but working in an environment where you chronically feel like a witch, always angry or impatient,often taking out your frustrations at home with loved ones is a recipe for disaster.
My client is going to be okay. She’s started to work on her plan to launch her business, has a time frame and steps to reach her goal. Each time we speak, she is feeling more upbeat and positive.
She has made the choice to stop hoping things will change and start creating the steps she needs to remove herself from that situation, earning an income in a way she doesn’t feel compromises her values or her stability.
I don’t know what your situation is like but I do know if you cringe every night when you think about going into work the next day, if you find yourself crying about your job or feeling depressed just thinking about it, or if you feel like you have no way out and come home feeling like a witch or worse, then you should seek help.
Staying at a job that is changing your personality, perspective and inner peace will gradually start to infiltrate other aspects of your life. You may look in the mirror and wonder what happened to that positive and pleasant person you knew who felt full of potential and who was excited about the future.
When you have stayed too long at a place that is not a fit for you, it’s easy to find yourself feeling like someone who is only in your element as a witch, a nag, a complainer, or a resentful, ungrateful stranger.
Our work should be a reflection of our best skills, our passion, our true interest and our creativity. When you are asked to compromise your real self and take on a persona just to cope and get through the day, the impact starts to take a toll.
For some people, there is an emotional impact, some experience physical symptoms and some feel like the witch my client described.
You have bills and responsibilities and have to earn an income, but ask yourself whether how you are earning it is costing you more than what you are really getting out of your job?
When that answer becomes a resounding,” Yes”, stop kidding yourself. Each day changes you a little more. Before you totally become someone you never wanted to be, start putting the pieces together to break free, to create a plan, to escape and move toward a better fit.
There is another way. Let’s Talk. I’ll give you 45 complimentary minutes and a way to leave your broom behind!
What does your job make you feel like?
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